Life Goes On...

Axenia was feeling disheartened. That was really the best word for it, even if you stared at the word long enough to see it broken down. Dis-heart-ened. It really seemed horrible out of context and dissected. To have one's heart removed seemed a gory, painful business. Much to violent and harsh a word for a feeling of being mildly put off and let down. Still, there it was, the word for it. A word Axenia reflected upon frequently in situations like the one she'd only just peeked out from under. Perhaps one day she'd get sick of feeling that word and stop putting herself out there. Become one of those women content to just sit at home with their pet and tick days off on their calendar. She wondered if her still-recent acquisition of a turtle was better or worse than owning a cat, as far as sad lonely women went. A turtle was obviously the stranger choice but did that signify a specialness in her or a simple strangeness.

Her date the other night had been abysmal. Facilitated this time by a classified ad in the tiny island's newspaper, a little low-tech compared to her usual fare. That night, after the failure was obvious she opened her computer and started searching sites. PlentyofFish, Match, Eharmony. She couldn't tell which held more promise and more chance of severe disappointment. At least this way she could get a good look at them before hand. Newspaper was so limiting that way. Not that her date had been unattractive. No he'd been plenty nice looking, but she was sure she would have seen his asshole-ishness radiate off a photograph like a scummy kind of halo. There was a little more safety on the internet, at least that was what she decided that night. A bit more of an ability to screen. Still, people weren't their profiles. She knew that well enough after Mac. But she held out hope regardless. It's not as if she was just going to strike it lucky and meet someone good for her on this tiny island. The pool of options was too small simple as that. Plus, Jack Snyder was still in it.

The next day after teaching class and wandering around town aimlessly for a time she decided she could use a drink, to ease some of the pain from the night before if nothing else. Heading for the Tavern. It was a bit of a walk, but she was wearing slightly lower pumps than usual and it was shaping up to be a beautiful evening. Walking along she replayed the events of the date with a grimace. He showed up in a tracksuit at the end of a jog for God's sake. Right there she should have said good bye and walked back home. Spent the night lying on her carpet and watching Dragomira try to bite into grapes that kept rolling away from her. Stepping into the little drinking establishment Axenia headed straight for the bar. She always had a fondness for bar stools. Even if it was a struggle for her to get her tiny self on top of them gracefully. Once she was up she always liked how her legs swung free. She crossed her legs beneath the fabric of her little blue sundress, she popped the back of her heels out of her gray pumps and gave her feet a bit of relief. Her eyes traveled along the bottles on the bar as she waited for the bartender on the other end to wander her way. She shook her fingers through the wildness of her red hair, all hanging down and free tonight. She liked the way it was sitting this morning.

She'd call a cab home if need be... They did have cabs on Green Ridge right?